A DAY IN THE LIFE

This is a classic. (Waking Up.) An attack! A frying pan fight! We learn that Xena needs to stop a warlord from looting a nearby village. (Finding Your Way.) While lost, the gals learn of yet another village in need. It's being threatened by a giant! (Making a Decision.) Which town to help first? Flip a coin! They head to face the giant with a townsman named Hower. (Traveling.) Xena and Gabrielle pass the time playing 20 Questions. Xena makes a stop to go fishing. We see the competitive nature between the two heroes really come out A LOT. Hower falls for Xena. (A Call From Nature.) Xena uses one of Gabby's scrolls for toilet paper. She deflects retribution. "The giant is coming...." Ha! (Giving Directions.) They plant a sign for the giant, Gareth. We meet Hower's girlfriend, Minya. She prepares a bath for the duo to help them concentrate. (Practice Makes Perfect.) The warrior princess practices her skills. "Zeus killed giants with lightning bolts!" "How are we going to get lightning bolts?" (Trial and Error.) Xena invents the kite! Gareth finishes off the warlord's army. (Waiting for Gareth). A funny bit with the chakram. Minya finishes off the warlord and Hower redirects his affections. Xena finishes off Gareth. (Going to Bed.) The day ends with Xena and Gabrielle finding images in the stars...and arguing. ; )

A NECESSARY EVIL

Gabrielle makes Ephiny the Queen of the Amazons (in her absence.) At the ceremony, Velasca makes an appearance. She also makes herself a god. A fight! She's after Gabrielle. "To fight an immortal, I need an immortal." -Xena. Helllooo Callisto! The others delay Velasca while Xena drops in where Hercules has Callisto trapped. She offers Callisto a shot at the ambrosia in exchange for her help. However, before they get down to business, they make a stop at a town where Xena publicly confesses her crimes against Cirra. Callisto is obviously moved by this. Next, they're off to the showdown. Velasca (God of Chaos) destroys the temple of Artemis (God of Amazons) on her way. Then, just as soon as they need her, Callisto switches sides! "You want Gabrielle; I want Xena." This doesn't last, however, and Callisto finds herself having to fight Velasca. They trap her beneath the ever popular choice -a pile of boulders. (A mere delay.) That night, there is a great dialogue shared between Gabrielle and Callisto. A bit of "truth or dare." The topics? Cirra and Perdicus. Callisto opens up herself to Gabrielle -only to make a most insensitive remark. The next plan, we soon learn, is to draw Velasca and Callisto onto a nearby rope bridge which hangs over a lava pit. Success! And, there, Callisto eats ambrosia and becomes a god. A fight! Xena cuts the ropes sending the gods into flame. AND she invents bungee jumping! Gabrielle believes that Callisto, deep down, is sorry.

THE QUEST

Poor Gabrielle is all alone. She's traveling to Xena's brother with Xena's body when Iolaus shows up...and leaves again. She travels through Amazon land and reencounters Ephiny. We learn that Queen Melosa is also dead! The new queen is Velasca -who holds jealously to her title. BUT the real right now belongs to none other than Gabrielle! Meanwhile, the King of Thieves is elsewhere -stealing the dagger of Helios when Xena's spirit takes over his body! She solicits his help in stealing her body from the Amazons -who soon convince Gabrielle to put Xena on a funeral pyre. Gabby's also decided to return to rule as queen. She catches Auto! (A mere delay.) Xena takes over yet again. A fight! Gabrielle sees the fight and believes it is Xena. They escape and Velasca's opposers are imprisoned. Xena speaks to Gabrielle through Autolycus. (And we may never know WHO gave a kiss. We SEE lips locked between Gabrielle and Autolycus but we can't tell if he looks confused or guilty. Did he steal that, too??) ANYWHO...our heroes have found ambrosia, food of the gods. Velasca shows up. But one needs the dagger of Helios to unlock the ambrosia. Wellll...Velasca gets the dagger and breaks poor Autolycus' arm in the process. He's thrown into prison with the others. Of course, with him around, they're not locked up for long. Xena takes over Gabrielle's body! The chakram is thrown! Velasca is stopped! Gabs feeds a bit of leftover ambrosia to Xena and she awakens. Unfortunately, Velasca (who is not completely dead as presumed) manages to scrounge up some of that jello-like food for herself, too....

DESTINY

Xena and Gabrielle visit Cyrra to understand "why it happened" and "how I can ever atone." Xena leaves Gabby's side for one minute and Gabs goes missing! While rescuing her from painted warriors, Xena is struck by a weapon (a tree trunk hanging in the woods.) This throws her body against a tree and throws her mind into the past! Gabrielle journeys with Xena towards the house of a healer while Xena's mind travels to her evil days. We see how she first crossed paths with Caesar and a girl named M'Lila. Caesar eventually betrays her and hangs her from a cross. M'Lila, who was the one to teach her the pinch, rescues Xena from that cross. Soon, however, M'Lila is killed by the Romans. Back in the present day, Xena slips away and we see her old self declare her new purpose in life: death. The present day Xena, however, declares, "I have to go back." To be continued....

HERE SHE COMES... MISS AMPHIPOLIS

Something is up at a beauty pageant! So Salmoneus has sent for Xena. She will pose as a Miss Amphipolis so that she can work from the inside, trying to stop a war from happening. Gabrielle poses as her sponsor. First, Xena uncovers a drag queen among the contestants, but she keeps this to herself. Later, during a show, Miss Amphipolis is exposed by a sponsor to be Xena! BUT the situation is quickly diverted by the drag queen who has stolen and is wearing Xena's armor. The competition narrows down to the semi-finalists. The talent events are put on rush and there is another attempted sabotage. (Xena stepped in.) Finally, Lord Claron admits to Xena that he's behind the attacks and then makes the mistake of trying to kill her. The pageant wraps up with Miss Amphipolis the winner -had she not withdrawn. Many other contestants also quit. The winner now? The queen!

THE XENA SCROLLS

The Xenaverse meets Indiana Jones' style! The year? 1940. Archaeologists dig in Macedonia. A gun fight of exceptionally poor aim ensues. Lucy Lawless is Southern Mel and Renee O'Connor is Indiana Janice. Mel translates ancient writings. "The most important archaeological find of the century" is the Xena Scrolls. And this is a clipisode! (Callisto.) Ted Raimi is Frenchman Leutenant Joxair. And a familiar villian is Smythe. (The Reckoning.) (Old B&W horror movies.) Mel finds the scrolls first. (Mortal Beloved.) They also find half of the chakram. It's magnetic-like power leads them to Smythe -who holds the other half. A fight! The 3 good guys escape into Ares' lair. The chakram unites as a whole and Ares awakens. He kills Smythe! We learn Joxair is a brush salesman from Jersey! And he's related to Joxer. (Callisto.) "It is written that only a descendant of Xena can release me back into the world," says Ares. And that's Mel! Janice is related to Gabrielle. (Callisto.) (Altared States.) Mel was putting on a show? She's actually tough? Ares calls her "Xena." (Hooves and Harlots.) (Doctor?) (Ties That Bind.) A fight! Ares gets trapped. 50 years later is a sales pitch for Rob Tapert's new TV show! (Main Title.)

A SOLSTICE CAROL

A scrooge-like king dishes out cruel punishments. He won't let the people celebrate solstice. A boy steals Xena's chakram for a tree-topper. X & G follow the thief to his orphanage. They too are under oppression there. So Xena, Gabrielle, and an ex toy maker named Sinticlese plot to non-violently change the king's mind. (Gabrielle buys a mule.) Then Xena poses as something akin to a Christmas Carol ghost. And Gabby poses as the king's dead wife. (Er...no. She didn't die; she left him!) Sinticlese goes to the orphanage in a disguise. (Hm. Looks a lot like Santa Clause!) We learn that the orphanage manager is the woman who left the king. The orphanage is under siege! A toy fight! The king has a change of heart. His wife forgives him. And Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, and the mule cross paths with a man, woman, and baby. The mule is given to them to help them on their journey. "May God smile on you always for your kindness." (And, with that, the child's face is all aglow.) Xena gives Gabrielle a toy lamb like Gabby cherished as a child. "Gabrielle, you are a gift to me." -Xena.